I'm now 40 years and 30 days old.
Now there's this... now what? feeling.
The first 30 days of being 40 have been... rough.
My focus... scattered.
My drive... missing.
My determination... lost.
How can so much change in just 30 days?
It's like a light switch turned off and now I'm fighting my way through the darkness to find the light switch again.
I went to my family doctor a couple of weeks ago.
I can't sleep. I'm irritable. Sad. Lost.
Tears flowed as I described my symptoms.
The diagnosis: Depression. I knew it before he said the word because I've been there before.
The winter season. The cold. Darkness. Work. Turning 40. Life. All of it has become a little too much. Just enough to tip the scale between being happy and sad.
So... it's time to fight to tip the scale the other way. It's always a fight to keep the sadness away. The little voices. The demon who comes to steal. Stealing happiness, hope, focus, determination, and drive.
A new journey must begin. From Fat to Forty... and Beyond...
John 10:10
~jen
